It has come to my attention, thanks to Beth, that I haven't updated this place in awhile. Summer is always a busy time around here. I suppose there is need for an update.

Rachel went away to camp again this year. She is becoming an amazing young woman; something I don't completely understand, but I welcome with a grateful heart. She came home with several stories, and she's anxious to go back next year. She will be a freshman in high school when school begins later this month. The days pass too quickly. She is beginning to look so much like Faith did when she was Rachel's age. We talk more, and I credit a very special woman who has stepped in to guide Rachel through this changing time in her life. Jean, along with her husband, have really provided Rachel an outside outlet when "Dad can't fix it."

Eli went away to camp too this summer, although his camp was local. He enjoyed the overnight opportunities, and he made a few new friends. Now, I can't seem to get one of those new friends out of my house. Eli will be going into fifth grade this year. He continues to read each and every book about outer space and astronauts that you place in front of him, and he's even begged me to attend a shuttle launch in Cape Canaveral. He's become quite a ballplayer as well. He led his team in RBI's this past season.

Brooks' cast has been removed, and he's back to his usual self. He will be in fourth grade this year, and he's excited to have the same teacher that Eli had last year. That's the only positive feeling he has right now about school. He's at that age where he feels he could survive without school because he's going to be in professional baseball one day. He's turning into such a little me. I was shuffling through pictures the other night, and I found one of me when I was around Brooks' age. The similarities were striking; poor kid.

Without trying to brag, my cape isn't completely torn with my older boys, but it's tattered. With Chase, that cape is still bright red. All of the kids have been protective of me over time, but he's become very protective. We've had our talks about that. Later this month, I will give him away to the wide and open world of first grade. Neither of us are prepared. My greatest fear is that I will let out the stress through work again. I don't want to do that. He's looking forward to flag football and future Little League, and he's excited to finally be a "four-footer." We reached that level earlier this year.

I'm so proud of all of them, and I'm humbled to be their daddy. It's one of the greatest feelings in the world to know that these four lives will enter this world someday and really make a difference.

As for me, there will always be days when I wake up lonely. I have come to believe that there will be days when I just wake up with a sinking feeling, and some of those days will occur for the rest of my life. It will be five years this September since I last saw my wife and daughter. It will be five years since I last kissed my wife; last held my little girl. It will be five years of constant solo-parenting. It will be five years of trying to provide double the hugs, double the kisses, double the talks, and double the love. I just can't bury my head in the sand next month. Life continues to move forward, and this family will continue to move forward too.